Nothing worse than doing your boss job while HE's on vacation. I find $600,000 State match funds he does not know he was to get. Upon return, his best friend MY supervisor lies & tells boss, everyone was late everyday while he was gone & $600,000 was HER idea. Worst thing, he believed her & I quit.

Today, while working at a certain California theme park in full costume, I was approached by a kid in line who looked at me and exclaimed, 'Hey look, its Indiana Jones!', which felt pretty amazing. His sister, who was maybe seven years old, glanced over at me and said, 'No, he's way too fat.'

Today, while waitressing at the Mexican restaurant I work at, a customer walks up and asks me why an Asian is working at a Mexican restaurant. I say I don't know and he proceeds to call me many derogatory Asian names and leaves. Funny thing is I'm not at all asian. I'm Mexican.

Today, I found out that my boss of the past two years is named Craig. I've been calling him Greg.

Today, at work as a cashier, I had a male customer come up to me and ask me what hours I worked today, like he has done for several weeks now. Immediately after, my manager calls my lane to tell me to watch out for that guy. He has been stalking a co-worker of mine. Apparently, I'm next.

Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow.

Today, I was informed that I won't be working on a project that I was very excited about. Instead, I'll be helping my boss's nephew 'get settled' into his new office suite so he can start work on the project.

Today, I got a phone call from a number I didn't recognize. It was a man with a speech impediment, and I began imitating him. He was the manager of a store I applied at. He wanted to arrange an interview.

Today, I was taking calls at the helpdesk I work at. The caller was a man, and while helping him with his issue he suddenly stopped to tell me I had a nice soothing voice. Then he told me to say something else. As I continued to help him, he started making moaning noises. I'm a guy.

Today, I sent out my resume to about a dozen jobs on craigslist. I realized that I hadn't updated it in a while and went to double check it after the fact. My ex at some point had changed my objective to "I'm a cocksucker who needs a job real bad.